The true gentleman

There was a famous advertisement on tv sometime ago depicting the true state of people (men in general) lacking in public courtesy. In that memorable advert, a self-centred man was seen sitting casually oblivious to his surroundings in a moving LRT. To cut the story short, he never gave up his seat to those deserving passengers. The best scene was when he pretends to doze off when a blind man enters the train. The ad ended with a heavily pregnant woman givng up her seat to the blind man eventually.

Have we seen this scenario somewhere before?

What happened to the good old days when a man used to courteously hold the door open for a woman or give up his seat for her on a bus or train? During my working days long ago, I have come to witness men (not all of them) who rush in for empty seats without any consideration whatsoever towards the ladies left standing whether they be young or old, plain or pretty, pregnant or handicapped or with young children towing behind them.

We certainly live in a very different world today. A materialistic and selfish world. Men today are conditioned to believe that machos are real men whilst gentlemen are sissies. Meanwhile women continue to stress that men and women are to be treated equally. They reason why let the men open the door for them when they can do it themselves. Hey, don't get me wrong here. I'm all for gender equality. Its just that sometimes I feel there are things best remain unchanged.

Something like gentlemanliness.

I'm not saying I'm a modern feminist kind of girl. Far from it. I'm just a simple old fashioned girl who finds nothing more attractive than a man who offers you his seat or opens the door for you, lets you enter or exit from the elevator or pulls up a chair for you in the restaurant. If you go to an expensive restaurant the waiter might do it for you but then he's getting paid for it. These days when a man gives salam or greet hello to me he'd be trying to sell me something. You can see a lot of them in the shopping malls or near the streets where you walk.

There are few such men left in this world. They are indeed a rare species. If you are lucky enough to come across one of them, be sure to tell him how much you appreciate his kind genteel manners.

He'll be touched, I'm sure.

The sister I never had

She was a rather quiet 7 year old. In her very young life, she had been distant from other people. She kept mostly to herself. She had none a friend and she didn't seem to want any. She had been independent since she was a little girl. She had also a bit of rebellious nature in herself. She didn't seem to need me as her sister. And I couldn't care less about it. We never really communicate or play together like sisters should. Perhaps the age gap difference has something to do with it. Or perhaps the divorce of our parents had made her become what she is today.

Stubborn, difficult and withdrawn.

After divorce, mom left to pursue her studies in the US. She left for a year. In her absence, I played the role of mom to my sister and brothers. I had to do all the houseworks by myself. It was also during this time that I became closer to my sister. We were happy in our own way. When mom finally returned home she took away my little sister with her. We were officially separated since then. The rest of us stayed with dad. After much deliberation, dad decides to send us to boarding schools. His decision was simple. So that we can continue our studies in peace and quiet.

Years went on until I finished schooling and furthered my studies at one of the local college. So did my brothers. I had not thought much about my sister then. After graduating, I looked for jobs and found one that suits my liking. It was also during this time that I stayed with mom again. We (me & my sister) hardly spoken to each other. Its like we have become strangers in the house. Many a time I tried to strike up a conversation with her just about anything but she'd just looked bored. Tanya soalan sepatah sepatahlah dia jawab.

Years went on again until I got married and she furthered her studies in the UK. Upon graduation, she went on to become a school teacher in one vocational school in Klang. But she wasn't satisfied with her teaching career and wanted to move on to bigger things. She took a master degree with full scholarship granted by the Japanese government for two years. It was during this time that something terrible had happened to her. She had a nervous breakdown.

She had to cut short her studies and came back here for treatment. During one of the visits to the psychiatrist, it was finally revealed why she had behaved the way she did. She was an angry and bittered person. She hold deep-seated feeling of resentment against our parents especially dad. She felt abandoned by dad. Dad never call or visit her at mom's place after the divorce. Not even once! He had never bought her things a father would. Never ever got any presents or well wishes during her birthdays. She had called him few times but was shrugged off too often as if he wasn't interested in what she was saying. She was really heartbroken. She felt unwanted. She hated mom for the way she nagged and lectured at her. She felt that mom was venting her own anger and frustration against her. She felt defenseless and hopeless. And she hated me for not being there when she needed me the most. I once asked her how she'd feel if dad dies? She said he means nothing to her now. She wasn't sure if she'd come to his funeral. It seems that she had severed her ties with dad permanently and I can't blame her for that.

I was totally shocked when the psychiatrist revealed the chilling discovery - that she had twice tried to take her own life by swallowing half bottle of sleeping pills while in Japan. She must felt really desperate to have to resort such unimaginable acts.

When the visits to the phychiatrist was finally over I had a heart to heart talk with her. I cried with her. I held her hand. I told her that I was so sorry to neglect her all this while. I was so cooped up with my own problems that I forgot that there was another soul who was confused and lost. A little girl who happens to be my sister. It took her years to become what she is now and I don't expect her to fully recover so soon.

I am so sorry, Ju. Please forgive me.

Till death do us part

Now I know what happens when you over-indulge and eat too much cake in one sitting - you get sick to your stomach. After a quesy spell that lasted long enough after my stomach forcefully purged the offender, I found it to be remarkably easy to develop strong aversion for the cake which used to be my big favorite. Its amazing how profound your memory of your favorite foods floating in the toilet bowl in their full digested state can be.

But I assure you its only a temporary setback coz I really like eating cakes especially when they are eaten for special occasion.

There's a particularly good reason why I gorged the way I did. It was my wedding anniversary yesterday. Just when I thought it was another plain day yesterday, he went and surprised me with his wonderful gesture. I just feel loved!

Unknowingly to me, the husband took a day off from his work and bought a black forest cheesecake from La Manila. How sweet. It was just a simple cake with no special written words on it. No candles on top to blow out either. Don't you just love cakes at La Manila? For the uninitiated, La Manila cakes are super hugh, less sugary and very filling.

That morning as usual, he was ready to go to work in his full working attire. After he left, I continued with my usual routine with the house chores, the kids and by 12.30pm, my two girls have already left for school. So there were just me and little junior left in the house. By this time, I heard a car coming into the porch and it was him. He came out from the car carrying a big red box that looked like a cake box and by then I knew it too well.

'..ehh...kata ada meeting ngan client pagi nih. kensel ke?..'

' I dah suruh orang lain pegi. Ambik cuti ari ni....' and he smirked at me with that cheeky look of his.

'..yee ke? apa tuh?..' I asked pretending not to know.

'...kek kita larr...kan ke ari ni dah 10 tahun kita kawen!..he quipped.

That's when it hit me.

'...eh diam tak diam dah 10 tahun kita kawen ek? tak sangka buah cempedak dah jadik nangka...' I replied.

'...yelah...dari slim mlim dah jadik tong dram...mestilah tak sangka ek...' he jokingly answered.

That's so typical of him saying those kind of words. Not that I'm sulking or what but that's who he is. He's not the kind of man who'd whisper sweet nothings to your ears and bring presents to make your day happy. But I know deep deep down in that 'brutal' heart of his, he loves me and me loving him back.

We are not perfect couple. We don't call each other sayang or darling like most romantic couples do. We talk like best friends talk. Sometimes when we feel like it, we act like kids ourselves and have a good laugh over it. We've had some pillow fights just for the fun of it. Racing up and down the stairs together. Or when we're in our adult mode while washing dirty dishes we converse just about everything, his work and the kids' progress together. And I can fart the loudest and foulest comfortably around him and likewise and we'd break into hearty giggles. Except that we don't do that plop thing together in the toilet...hehe.

* So enough of this babbling and to Mr KC, its been jolly good fun having you as my husband. I'm so honoured to be your wife. Here's to 100 years more! Happy 10th anniversary to us, dahling!

If I could live one day without consequences

I would:-

• Skip all house works and go to sleep the whole day and wake up the next morning. Let the kids fend for themselves (sniggers)
• Shave my hair totally bald (aye to Britney Spears)
• Go to a nice posh restaurant, order all I want and then sneak out without paying the tab
• Send hate mails to all the people I dislike. I think I can break Sharifah Aini's record
• Ram that bulldozer into my neighbour's house whose badass pussycat keeps littering on my compound
• Walk with style in a two piece bikini around my neighbourhood
• Wear bright colourful saree to do grocery shopping at the pasar malam
• Write graffiti on my kids' school bathroom walls.
• Shit on the road leading to the neighbourhood and let the rotten aroma lingers on and make them guessing was it a cat poop or chicken poop or a mixture of both?
• Shoot dead all paedophiles and rapists
• Assassinate George W Bush and his affiliates and replace him with Oprah Winfrey.

See you in court!

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned! This lady has certainly taken the word revenge to new heights. If you suspect your spouse has been rolling under the sheets with someone else, why be miserable when you can get even.

Get it advertised for the whole world to see.