A multitasker I am not

In case you're wondering where I've been in this last few days, wonder no more. I was busy sewing my daughters' badges and name tags on their tudung sekolah. On top of that, I have to do wrapping for their school text books that are piling up on the table. Manyak leceh punya kerja oii! I have only two school going daughters but the way I'm preparing things its like I have 10 kids in the house...sheesh! Well the truth is, this kelam kabut scenario is expected if I do things at the last minute. Serves me right.

Sometimes I wish I could do multi-tasking like Mrs_Doubtfire. Who? No idea who she is? Helloooo!

Yup, that well mannered old lady who can do mountains of house chore and keeping the house spotlessly clean no doubt and yet had that same level of energy left to prepare delicious home-cooked meals that look like a perfect display in a posh restaurant. As if that is not enough, she is also a confidante to the madam of the house and a nanny to the children and still looking perky and tidy after a hard day's work.

Only sometimes I tend to forget that it is just a movie. Nobody can do that in real life. No way Jose! I've tried doing several house chores in one go and I would be completely exhausted by the time I'm done let alone prepare a decent meal. Yeah, looks like age is getting to me alright but for Mrs Doubtfire, age is just a number. Oh, you wicked wicked woman!

So in between this and that, the news of Benazir Bhutto's assassination somewhat jolted me. Speechless was all I could muttered. Her untimely death is certainly a big shocker to the rest of the world. Al-Fatihah! May her soul rest in peace. And since today is the last day for the year 2007, I have nothing to wish for or new resolutions to make except that Nurin's killer(s) MUST BE found at all cost!

Happy New Year!

Lagi lagi tag!

I've been tagged by Elara. Please don't be fooled by her name. She happens to be a man actually!

Its pretty hard to dodge when you're trying to avoid being tagged. I've been doing just that for every blog that I'd been visiting to and pray hard that my name won't be mentioned. Heck, I didn't even dare to leave comments on certain blog, afraid that I'd have to answer them....tee hee hee.

Okay, in the spirit of sporty-manship, lets do this tag very quickly.

1. Name one person who made you laugh last night. A: A friend of my tukang urut. While I was being massaged (heavenly) by the masseuse, her friend told dirty jokes. And the woman is in her 50's! Dasattttt....

2. What were you doing at 0800? A: Washed the porch

3. What were you doing 30 minutes ago? A: Bancuh susu for my youngest son

4. What happened to you in 2006? A: Sheesh, tak ingatlah! Nothing significant I guess...

5. What was the last thing you said out loud? A: Balik balik... dah maghrib nih! Sapa tak masuk rumah kang kena kurung kat luar sampai esok pagi! I was yelling that to my kids yesterday.

6. How many beverages did you have today? A: Donno...never count one

7. What color is your hairbrush? A: Don't have hairbrush only a comb, purple color some more!

8. What was the last thing you paid for? A: This morning bought text books and paid school fees for the religious school for my daughters

9. Where were you last night? A: At home

10. What color is your front door? A: Grey color

11. Where do you keep your change? A: In my purse and also in small container in the kitchen

12. What’s the weather like today? A: Right now? Its raining drizzily

13. What’s the best ice-cream flavor? A: I guess it has to be yam flavour (my tastebud)

14. What excites you? A: Many things...too many to mention here

15. Do you want to cut your hair? A: Nope, I'm keeping it long this time.

16. Are you over the age of 25? A: Way over...

17. Do you talk a lot? A: When I am with good company...yeah! Macam bertih jagung...pot pet pot pet

18. Do you watch the O.C.? A: Nope

19. Do you know anyone named Steven? A: An ex-colleague of the husband. Femes tol nama nih!

20. Do you make up your own words? A: Hell yes! Shec-ka-feck, unta baral, sitambara....just to name a few and those are normally expletive words..haha!

21. Are you a jealous person? A: Hmm, this one is tough. I'm not really a jealousy type of person. Jealous towards the husband? Hmm, maybe a little but I WILL NEVER show it to him! Tak main lah tunjuk jeles-jeles kat org laki ni! Mesti maintain vogue ok? Hahaha...

22. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter 'A'. A: Ayu

23. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter ‘K’. A: Aiseh, takde lah kut

24. Who’s the first person on your received call list? A: The husband of course

25. What does the last text message you received say? A: From the husband that says - malam ni masak apa?

26. Do you chew on your straw? A: Nope

27. Do you have curly hair? A: Yeeahh, sorta. I have natural wavy hair

28. Where’s the next place you’re going to? A: After I'm done with this tag, the kitchen to start cooking for dinner...sigh!

29. Who’s the rudest person in your life? A: I've encountered a lot of rude people in the course of my work back then but I've learnt to take it in my stride. There's no point in arguing with rude people and I try my very best to stay away from such people in my life. So much negative vibes around these people I tell you....not good for my health!

30. What was the last thing you ate? A: Rice with the usual lauk pauk. Today I cooked hati masak kicap berempah, sayur bayam tumis air and telur dadar...my kids love them!

31. Will you get married in the future? I'm already married duh! I'm happy to say that I'm a one man woman!

32. What’s the best movie you’ve seen in the past 2 weeks? A: Just yesterday I watched the movie Stepmom on HBO with Julia Roberts and Susan Sarandon in the lead role. I've watched it countless times before, yet it has never fail to evoke emotion in me. I so heart this movie!

34. When was the last time you did the dishes? A: This afternoon

35. Are you currently depressed? A: Nope

36. Did you cry today? A: Nope

37. Why did you answer and post this? A: Coz I got nothing better to do

38. Tag 5 people who would do this survey: Ok, let see if CikDinz, UBA, Gab, Ibu and U.Lee are willing enough to do this.

Saved by the seatbelt!

an accident photo snagged from google image

Last weekend was a bit of an eye opener for me. And also something to pause and reflect deeply. About life that is so precious. About how some of us took for granted the very basic of safety in the car precisely.

Last saturday we got to know that a friend of the husband had met with an accident. It was a major accident. She was travelling with her husband, 3 children and both her parents. Sadly, her mother was killed in the accident but the rest were still alive, thankfully!

When we reached the hospital, there were many people loitering around the ward area. We assumed they were the relatives of them. We managed to speak to her husband; he was treated as an outpatient due to minor injuries suffered but his wife was in bad shape. We were told that part of her liver had ruptured and that she'd have to go for surgery. She was still under observation and was heavily sedated when we visited her. We were surprised to see her father was well and not a scratch on his body. He is one lucky man indeed.

Then we went to the 8th floor - the paediatric ward. All her 3 children were safe, Alhamdulillah. The eldest child was covered with minor cuts and bruises all over her body and she was a bit upset. She was wailing. Later we found out that she was crying for her grandma. We weren't sure if she had known the truth about her grandma. The second child was ok. He was also treated as an outpatient and only had cuts on his head. But the youngest child's condition made my heart weeped. His left arm and right leg were bandaged, his face was swollen like a balloon and we were told that he had suffered a fall on his head. How bad it is we don't know. He's only 14 months old. The prognosis was not good. The impact of the fall caused his brain to swell. His brain could be partly damaged. However it is only a prognosis, nothing is certain yet. Pray hard to Allah that he'll be alright and back on his two feet again. It is so hard to imagine a child that young would be disabled for his whole natural life.

Only later we found out how the accident happened. They were traveling in an MPV going north for the holidays when the car skidded somewhere in Tanjung Malim after trying to avoid something infront. Apparently a canvas from a truck had fallen on the road causing the driver to swerve the car to the right but he lost control of the wheel. The car was rolling all over like a ball until it came to a halt. The car had landed on its top! The grandmother was thrown forcefully out of the window and her head smashed on the road. She was killed instantly. When they found her, she was clutching the baby tightly to her chest. Blood was splattered all over the place. It was a heartwrenching scene. From the info that we gathered, we came to know that the grandfather had escaped unhurt because he had worn the seatbelt. None of the other passengers in the car wear it not even the driver himself! Can you imagine the speed that they were travelling on a highway without wearing seatbelts? It is tantamount to reckless endangerment. The baby should have been strapped to a baby car seat not on a lap.

Accidents may occur even if we are careful with driving and take all the necessary precautions. That is fate. But I just can't help thinking that if only they had fastened their seatbelts, the casualty could have been reduced. The grandmother's life would have been spared.

Just a thought

A quote from a recent movie that forever etched in my mind;

"People should not be afraid of their governments. The governments should be afraid of their people"

From the movie "V For Vendetta"

TV series of yesteryears

Just like what this gal wrote in her entry here, I too was bitten by the youtube bug. Besides youtube there's another current craze ongoing - facebook! Whilst I'm not into facebooking just yet, it is a matter of time before I'll jump on the bandwagon like everybody else.

In the meantime, enjoy watching some of these long gone tv series (opening credits) that used to grace our idiot box back in the 70's and 80's respectively in no particular order.

Little House On The Prairie

Bonanza

High Chaparral



Space 1999

Hawaii Five 0

Kojak



Starsky & Hutch

Six Million Dollar Man


The Bionic Woman



Charlie's Angels

Cagney & Lacey

The A-Team



Airwolf



Macgyver

Even responsible mom makes mistake too...

Although I may not be perfect in so many ways, I'd like to think of myself as being a responsible and doting mom to my kiddos. I was also willing to suspend my career (not like I have a super duper one) for them. I want to be there during their formative years. To hear their first words, to witness their first giant steps and to just simply watch them grow up. Every single moment of their babyhood and childhood that are precious to me is the reason behind my decision to be a stay-at-home mom. I wouldn't want to miss it for the world. After all they live as a child only once.

Okay, enough with this monologue thing. Just go straight to the point please!

Last monday was a harrowing experience for me. I made a careless mistake. Totally big. I blame myself for not monitoring Little B as I always have. Never underestimate the inquisitive mind of a two year old child.

I was totally absorbed in browsing the internet like always when I noticed that Little B was unusually quiet. He must be up to something this time. I began looking and calling him in the kitchen and living room but there was no response from him. I went looking for him in the bathroom. Nada. Then I went into the bedrooms upstairs searching for him under the beds and in the closets (he likes to play hide and seek in those places) and the linked bathrooms but found nothing. I began to feel worried and wondered where on earth did he go to. Its like he'd dissappeared into thin air.

Then I went downstairs and remembered there's one more room I hadn't checked. There he was behind the door holding something in his hand and coughing. At first I thought he had choked on something and immediately I carried him onto my lap made him sit up with his head slightly facing down and began patting harder on his back to remove whatever that it was in his mouth but nothing came out. The coughing won't stop and it was getting worse until I saw his reddened face and teary eyes. Only then I realised the thing that he had held in his hand. It was an empty bottle of Kak Ngah's bath oil. It was for external use only. Ya Allah! Little B had swallowed the liquid! I don't know how much. I was getting panicked but tried to remain calm as possible.

I inserted my finger inside his mouth and tried to tickle his throat to make him vomit but it didn't come out. Since he kept on coughing I gave him water to drink. The coughs didn't stop but Little B had become tired, probably from incessant coughing and crying. Slowly his eyelids became droopy and he dozed off in my arms within seconds.

I began to reach for the handphone and text messaged the husband to come home pronto. Too bad that he had just started work in a new company on the same day and the briefings he had attended to was abruptly interrupted by the news at home. While waiting for him to reach home I immediately called the emergency dept at nearby hospital and asked the nurse on duty what I should do in my son's case. She said she can't really tell over the phone and that she had to see my son in physical form and she advised me to hurry up. If there's a need to pump out his stomach content then so be it.

While doing all the above, I kept putting my hand on Little B's chest just to check if he was still breathing. Thank god, he was but his breathing was a bit croaky.

Long story short.

The good doctor checked his abdomen and found nothing serious. We brought along the bottle and after checking the ingredients he said there was nothing to worry about. It was non-toxic. The liquid paraffin that my son had swallowed also acts as laxative and will come out eventually when he pass motion. Just give him lots of plain water to flush out the liquid and he should be fine after that. Phewww! He also REMINDED me not to let it happen again. Hahaha padan muka!

Good advice doc!

Moral of the story (especially yours truly); Janganlah dok asyik berinternet je sampai anak pun lupa nak tengok ... isk isk! People, don't be like me ok?

Where do broken hearts go...

I just got to know that my friend Enon had recently gone thru another broken heart episode. All I could say to her was; tak pelah Enon, dah bukan jodoh you dengan dia. kumbang bukan seekor.

Enon's story on how she discovered her ex's true status was quite comical. On that fated day, she was listening to a popular radio station while driving when one of the radio callers happened to be her ex-beau. He was calling in to dedicate a song to his wife!

Of course she was devastated and felt cheated.

So I'm dedicating this song solely for Enon. I sincerely hope that she will find her prince charming one day. Just don't lose faith and hope ok babe!

Renjis-renjis dipilis

It's that time of the year folks! 

pic snagged from google

Yes, wedding invitations are pouring in like spill milk in my postbox lately. Mostly from our relatives and office colleagues (in my case ex-office colleague). Some with addresses coming from as far as Kedah and some from within KL itself. It seems that our weekends starting late last month are fully booked till end of December just to attend these weddings.

When someone posted you a wedding invitation card follow up with phonecalls that start with something like; please make sure you come ahh or make yourself available on that date or you better come or else, it's pretty hard to avoid it when you are being blackmailed.

And then you have to scratch your head searching high and low for the perfect gift for the newly weds. Whilst it is very convenient to give presents in the form of monetary, it is not that simple when closest friend comes into the picture. Sometimes you need to think out of the box what sort of present that will most suit them in terms of sentimental value, uniqueness and most importantly appropriate for married couples.

When my sister in law got married 3 years ago, we gave her a National cooking stove with 2 burners (not so pricey anyway). Yes I know, it is not a cool wedding gift to give to a newlyweds. But we are practical people. So when she and her husband finally got to opening their presents, she was dumbfounded and managed to utter a few words;

"What, a cooking stove? This has got to be one of the most weirdest gift I've ever had", she claimed.

"Why not? This is the perfect gift for you to start learning how to cook and make your husband proud knowing that he has NigellaLawson wannabe wife preparing meals in the kitchen..." I replied in a zest.

Well, she wasn't exactly the domestic kind of person. In fact, she never cooks in her entire life not even for herself. Anak manja dalam family lah tuh. Good advice in a very subtle way huh? Ha ha ha!

In the meantime, it looks like I have to forgo my plan to watch that sappy movie CINTA that has been the talk of the town lately. I'm really not a big fan of malay movies but this one has caught my attention due to its overwhelming hype from the media and people. Well, there's always the dvd pirated version to look out for.

Opps, just don't tell that to anyone ahh?

Chaos in the middle

this is how my reaction looks like when i see the house tunggang langgang...

What happens when you have two rambunctious primary schoolers and an active toddler all grouped together in one place? That's right.

Chaos in the middle!

I always dread the LONGGG school holidays. School holidays means; I don't get to have a moment of solitary in the house. And I also don't get to watch my favorite show on teevee. This is also the time I get to wrestle with them for the tv remote and I always lose, sigh! How can you win when three strong agile kids are cornering you at every chance they get? 3 lawan 1 mana boleh daa!

School holidays also means the kids are always hungry and I'm always fixing snacks every two hours for them. The speed at which I'm preparing their lunches and snacks in between marvels me sometime.

School holidays also means I get to wash loads of ever piling up laundry. It gets even worse after balik kampung/or holiday trips. My laundry baskets have never been empty since like 10 years ago. And yes, I have 8 laundry baskets with 8 different colours to differentiate each use. I could open a laundry service coz I am so good at separating fabrics.

School holidays also means I get to see my house all wrecked up. Forget cleaning up coz it'll be topsy turvy in split seconds.

Arghhhh, I give up!

Never gonna give you up!

You don't have to dance like Britney Spears do but when you have a great voice like Rick Astley why not getting jiggy a lil' bit.

Suddenly I'm into 80's mood today.

Off the scale

Women who can easily assume to their normal svelte figures after childbirth will never cease to amaze me. Before I turned into what I am today, I was a slim person with an average weight of 45kg. With a height of 5ft tall, I was considered as petite. That was the weight before I had children. Even if I overeat, my weight would still maintain or at least increase 2-3 kgs the most. It has never reached the 50kg mark. When I feel like bloating I would go on a diet for two consecutive weeks and my weight would drop back to normal. It helps too that I was also active in aerobics and other fitness regime that would speed up the lose weight process very fast. It has been that way for such a long time ever since I was anak dara right till I got married.

After the kids came along, I became lazy to do workouts. Even simple and easy workouts that can be done in the comfort of my home couldn't make me move butt. I couldn't care less about my appearance too. Tending a baby itself coupled with the household chores were already a full time workout for me. And yes, I had a dinosaur appetite too!

Years went on until I had my third baby that it suddenly dawned on me that I had become JenniferHudson! Whilst Jennifer had all the excess flesh strategically placed in all the right spot - mine didn't. In other words, the bottom half is bigger (and wider) than the top half .... sheesh!

I used to wear a size S but now its always XL or XXL! My weight had exceeded the 50kg mark a very LONGGGG time ago and now it has tripled. At the time I'm writing this my weight had touched 67kg mark on the scale! Either the scale had been faulty or I'm in denial mode, whichever way it is - I am officially overweight!

Because of extreme laziness to exercise I had resorted to shortcuts which gave immediate results in minimum time but deadly in the long run. How many of us had taken those slimming drinks/herbs/pills which proclaim to lose weight in shorter period of time? And also those slimming lotions' claims that can diminish orange peel or cellulite on every nook and corner of our skin? I had tried and tested some of these products. Yes, some of them certainly gave excellent results but I'm also concerned of its side effects in the long term. Will it damage my kidney or liver if I took it longer than I'm supposed to? These uncertainties had made me stop taking consummable slimming drinks/herbs but I still continue the slimming lotions once in a while.

For now, its aerobics (held FOC) once a week every weekend and also brisk walking when I have the opportune time. I try to eat sensibly, drink lots of water and cut down on rice portion. It used to be one whole plate but now half of it. I don't skip meals. That's a big no no! Skipping meals tend to make you go extra hungry and therefore have larger meals to compensate the skipped meals. But I tend to break my own rules sometimes when the side dishes accompanying the rice are so deliciously tempting especially when its cooked kampung style ..... hmmm!

Yeah, it will definitely take longer time to see the results but as pepatah melayu once said - sikit sikit lama lama jadi bukit but in my case it should be amended as sikit sikit lama lama jadi plywood ... ahaks!

Here and There

What have I been up to lately? Nothing! For the last three weeks, I had been invited to every open house there is in the neighbourhood and gained extra pounds in the process. Time to lose some weight, a very impossible mission to accomplish but when a woman's gotta do, she's gotta do!

Got some pictures to show here but I'm not telling just yet which one is her...hehe. She's still too shy to show her real self especially when she has gotten a bit (read: a lot) plump on the side...hahahaha!

Pictures courtesy of Bunga and Yatt.

aikk...camner lah gambar ni boleh termasuk kat sini? err...everybody, this is NOT raya pic! I repeat NOT raya pic.

oopss! hehehe...this pic was meant for "acara selingan" only...it was actually drawn by a pre-schooler. supposed to be a scissor but somehow it turned out to look like....err nevermind! That kid deserves an A+ for originality and spontaneity!

Slowing down until...

Will be flying below radar for the next couple of months due to going pc-less starting next week. I won't be able to do blogging or bloghopping as much as I want to. Well, there's always the husband's company laptop but then he uses it all the time...sigh! Cybercafe? Nah, I'm just too old for it. I wouldn't be caught dead in that place. Buy a new laptop? Yeah sure, we kinda thought of that but short on the budget.

I wonder how I am going to survive without it? Slowly, I am trying (very hard) to detach myself from blogging and other related stuff so that when the time comes I won't be so miserable without my pc. Tell ya, it hasn't been that easy to do it when you're so used to it.

God help me!

The most eligible bachelors

Plain and pretty girls will scream at the top of their lungs. Straight guys will look at them with envy. The not so straight ones will look at them with lustful wagging tongues. The makciks and pakciks can only dream on wishing that they will become their ultimate menantu idaman. They are almost perfect to a point of no fault. They make head turns wherever they go. Such were their strong magnetism.

Bachelor No 1

A jack of all trades. His impressive list of resume will make Dr McDreamy (from the grey's anatomy series) sound like Dr Doogie Howserish. Dr Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor Al-Masrie bin Sheikh Mustapha (such a mouthful name) is not only an astronaut, he is also an orthopaedic surgeon, a restaurateur and a part-time model. And did I mention that he is good looking too? Wow!

Bachelor No 2

He was dubbed as lelaki melayu terakhir until Dr Sheikh came along. He even outshone Pak Lah's popularity (and also eligibility before he remarried mrs doubtfire) at the height of his stardom. His name is Asmawi Ani or fondly known as Mawi. He first became well known after appearing in Akademi Fantasia. The same academy that had churned out the best tone deaf singers in the history of malaysian tv entertainment.

Bachelor (or is it bachelorette) no 3

Err...nevermind!

What else is new?

‘English only’ ruling for Maths and Science in secondary schools put on hold
By TEH ENG HOCK

KLUANG (Johor): Following the Government's decision on the Mathematics and Science papers in the UPSR, secondary school students will not be forced to use English for these subjects in their examinations in the next two to three years.

The Education Ministry will review the teaching and learning syllabus as well as the co-curriculum and teachers’ education before deciding whether Malaysian students are ready for “English only” examinations.

The initial plan was to have Year Six pupils answer their Mathematics and Science papers completely in English from next year.

However, said minister Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Tun Hussein, he had promised MCA leaders and Chinese educationists that he would make a decision by this year as to whether to go ahead with the plan.

“I am glad to have fulfilled that promise,” he told reporters at a Hari Raya open house at his home in Taman Sri Lambak here yesterday.

Present was Johor Mentri Besar Datuk Abdul Ghani Othman, who had also voiced the view of the state Umno committee last year to put on hold the implementation of the “English only” ruling.

On Saturday, Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi announced that UPSR examination candidates would continue to have the choice of taking the two subjects in either English or Malay (or the vernacular language of their school.)

The Prime Minister explained that the schoolchildren had yet to attain proficiency in English. Hishammuddin said secondary students would also continue to have the dual-language option although many of them have a “decent command” of English.

He said the weak students were mostly from the rural areas.

“I will not do things on an ad hoc and piecemeal basis. I want to do it (using English) as a whole.

“I want the foundation to be solid (at the primary level) before we look at the secondary schools,” he said.

He added, however, that many secondary students chose to do the papers in English.

Citing matriculation students, he said 95% of them did their papers in English.

Abdul Ghani, who is Johor Umno chairman, said putting on hold the implementation of “English only” papers for Mathematics and Science would allow students to master both English and Malay.

At its state convention last year, the party voiced its concern over the use of English for the two subjects.

This drew comments from some quarters that it was a backward move and would not encourage young Malaysians to learn English. Asked about this, Abdul Ghani said: “Sometimes, it is a misconception. Sometimes, it is just some people trying to create issues.”

NURIN Alert!

Latest (not so by the time I'm writing this) update

Yes! She has been found - safe and sound! Thank god for that!

But there's a plausibility side of Recka's (thats her real spell-checked name) story that the police are investigating into. Donch know if she was telling the truth. Either she ran away or been kidnapped - it don't matter anymore.

But what I do know, Recka had learnt a very valuable lesson that day!

Have you seen her?

She was reportedly missing from home after going to the pasar malam to buy some vcds. Her name is Rekha Abdullah and she's 10 years old.

I don't know how long she's been missing but finding her is very CRUCIAL right now! We certainly don't want another Nurin tragedy befall on this innocent girl.

Forget those powers that be that has been dilly-dallying the process of materialising the Nurin Alert programme. They are as slow as a snail can be.

Another girl is missing and she DESPERATELY needs our help.

Let's find her!

Footnote: Read here for more reports.

My cubicle

Don't you just love that James Blunt's sickly sweet one-hit wonder song ? I do.

So famous is the song that a chinese bloke had made a spoof out of the song. Ahhh singaporeans, they don't call themselves kiasu for nothing.

Blogger's block

This is exactly what happen after a long break. 

I got nothing to write! 

When I have nothing to blog about I will change the template until I get bored! 

Google should better come up with new templates or I'm moving my blog elsewhere! (in my best little girl pout)

Someone once asked me why I keep changing my template like ever so often and my answer was;

Dah aku punya blog suka hati aku lah nak buat apa.

Kapisch.

Eidul Fitri

children in the 50's looking resplendent in their raya clothes

The signs are obvious aren't they? Barely two weeks of ramadhan we are hearing raya songs blasting from the shopping malls and radio stations for as longest as I can remember. Hordes of raya entertainment programmes are lining up on the cable and free tv channels filled to the brim with raya song of yesteryears. And not forgetting those raya-theme dramas with the usual wearisome storylines that I can predict the endings with my eyes closed. Between these, you can bet one or two Hindi films making their profound presence on the first week of raya. I mean hey, its hari raya for goodness sake and they're showing Bollywood movies?

I remember vividly about four years ago when the whole bunch of us (including the in-laws) balik kampung on first raya to visit close relatives and right smack in their living room, Khabi Khushi Khabie Gham was shown on the tube and needless to say people in the house were glued to it oblivious to their surroundings. Oh well, who can really blame them when Shah Rukh Khan and Kajol were the main attraction. As they say, if you can't beat them join them.

Of course hari raya isn't complete without the must haves mouth-watering dishes such as rendang, ketupat, lemang and raya cookies. Raya cookies either home-made or store-bought they are truly a sight to behold. Its really sad that not many households today have traditional cookies to offer during raya. Gone are the days when the likes of batang buruk, putu kacang, samperit, kuih ros (some people call it kuih loyang), kuih bakar, kuih makmur and bahulu adorn the cookie jars. They had been replaced with pineapple jam tart, almond london, cornflakes and so many other cookies with contemporary names.

And last but not least, duit raya is a must nowadays. And should be given in green angpows. It used to be 10 or 20 cents in good old days but if you give that kind of amount today you might get a surprise look on the childrens' face. How times have changed indeed.

I would like to take this opportunity to wish all my blogger friends Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri and maaf zahir batin from the bottom of my heart.

Have a safe trip back home and come back in one piece!

Say a little prayer

I've never even met her before. I only got to know her from her blog. I can't really remember who discover who first but ever since then I will make it a weekly if not daily visit to her place. Her stories are so ordinary, delightful and yet sometimes thought-provoking mostly revolve around her family, friends and life in a foreign land. I felt entertained just by reading her musings on life itself.

But for this past couple of weeks her story had been different. The kind that would tear your heart apart. Its about her beloved husband who is stricken with cancer (advanced stage) recently. For many of us, the very mention of the word cancer bring an instant sombre mood. Its the one news that we are not happy to hear. No matter how hard it is for us to accept it its even harder for the person(s) concerned to come to terms with it.

D's latest posting about her husband's condition really sank in my heart. I sincerely hope that Mrs D is given utmost courage and strength to withstand this very trying times of her life. Her display of calmness and patience in coping with her husband's illness is truly remarkable and admirable. To D, I'm sending you my little prayers.

A tale of two neighbours

"Heee...tak kuasa aku nak jaga ko lagi" tiba-tiba kedengaran satu suara yg amat kukenali sedang berkumandang di belakang dapur rumah ku.

"Mana nak jaga anak orang lain yg berderet2 tuh, nak jaga korang lagi...aku tak sanggup dah, suruhlah mak ko hantaq kat tempat lain, aku tak larat nak jaga lagi, menyampah betul aku" geram betul suara tu berbunyi.

"Apahal kak wan? macam marah je..." aku bersuara sambil terkejut ialah orang mengamuk pagi sakan kut ada apa ke.

"Ni hah...kak wan dah tak sanggup dah. kak wan nak tolak bebudak nih kat orang lain. nyusahkan orang je. maknye pun satu, tau beranak je tapi jaga anak tak reti. orang lain pun beranak gak tapi anak tak serupa comot macam ni. pagi-pagi lagi dah comot, busuk pulak tu, tak reti ke mak depa sarongkan pampers ka apa ka...kecik-kecik camni mana lah depa reti nak bagitau nak pi kencing berak ka.." amuk si kak wan, jiranku yg kerjayanya mengasuh anak orang.

"Sabor ajelah kak wan. nak buat camner, dah maknye tak reti bahasa punya orang. kenkadang heran betul lah depa ni yek, datang sini naik kereta menjalar, baju sikit lah punye smart, nak kata tak berduit, nampak cam berduit...entah lah saya pun tak tahu nak cakap apa.." sampuk aku sambil menggeleng-gelengkan kepala yang tak pening.

"Hissh...kak wan tengah geram sangat nih. dahlah maknye selalu ngelat nak bayar duit..boring betul lah kak wan camni.." sambung kak wan dalam loghat kedahnya yang pekat macam kuah sate hj samuri.

"Hah!...apasal tak bayor duit pulak. apa punye orang cam nih...tau hantor anak tapi tak tau nak bayor duit. apasal kak wan tak mintak je...camni punye orang pon ada gak ke? suruh dia jaga anak dia sendiri lah. anak sapa nih kak wan?" aku pulak yang tumpang geram sekaki bila dengar keluh kesah kak wan. Nampak sangat kak wan ni selalu kena buli.

"Anak kucing..." balas kak wan dengan muka selamba. Adeh!

14 going on 40

Yesterday I celebrated my birthday; the BIG four zero! Nothing fancy or special. The husband just bought a BIG cake with four BIG candles and a slight nudge to remind yours truly that she wasn't getting any younger...sheesh! Thanks a lot dear for that kind words of encouragement. Just the thing I need to go thru this new phase in life. Boo hoo!

They say life begins at forty. What a load of crap! I say death begins at forty for this is the time when we are reminded to check our health every 6 months or so, eat more greens and avoid fat laden foods, exercise more, sleep less, less sex (say what?)....yadda yadda yadda. For muslims this is also the next phase where we should think and do more of the akhirat than duniawi stuff. There's even a malay proverb that appropriately described it - rumah kata pergi kubur kata mari.

Whatever it is, I should be grateful for I am still blessed with a good health (for now), a responsible and caring (in his own way) husband, wonderful 3 kids, what else could I ask more right? And then the husband gave a wink at me and said sheepishly, one more kid?" I gave him the look. Say what? Obviously he hasn't heard what the doctor said that getting pregnant in the forties might not be a good idea what with all the complications and what not.

And I wonder how Sheila Majid did it so smoothly. Pregnant in her early forties and she looked so radiant and glamorous some more.

Some women have all the luck. Sigh!

A little girl lost

Latest update (21st Sept):-

Malaysians yesterday were informed of the latest findings on the body that was found in a bag last monday was that of Nurin Jazlin, the 8 yr old girl who went missing last month after DNA testing was conducted on the body. My heart bleeds when I heard the news for I was hoping that she would return safely to her parents but that was not to be. It is fated that she left this world in a tragic way. May the perpetrator(s) who did this inhuman act to her be caught alive and be punished severely by the law.

Until he is caught no child is safe!

Al-fatihah kepada adik Nurin semoga roh beliau ditempatkan di kalangan orang orang mukmin. Semoga keluarga Nurin menerima berita ini dengan penuh redha dan tabah menghadapi dugaan yg sangat berat dan pahit ini. Amin!

The dissappearance of adik Nurin_Jazlin reportedly missing since August 20 has entered its fourth week this week and still there is no sign or clue as to where she is now. As if that is not enough eight year old Nurin is also stricken with kidney ailment and high blood pressure. And she's on daily medication.

Nurin was last seen going to the night market nearby her home. Why oh why do I think that her parents are to be blamed for this? Letting an eight year old child walking alone to a night market is not exactly a responsible thing to do even if she had been there many times and familiar with the surroundings. But lets not dwell on this matter further. What is done is done. I'm sure her parents have suffered enough for taking granted on her safety.

I dread to think of Nurin's fate at this moment. Here I am sitting on my cosy chair writing this entry about her while my son is watching toy story in the living room safe and sound and yet at the same time somewhere there is this frightened little girl whose life is in grave danger. Suddenly I feel sick to my stomach. I pray hard that whoever is holding her right now would take great care of her well being while she's in 'captive'. And I also pray that the person who took her would have a change of heart and return her safely to her family.

While we're on the subject its very important for us parents to monitor our kids no matter where they are and who they are with. I have seen countless times kids probably in their pre-teens at the night market near my place went alone unaccompanied by their parents or guardians. I often shake my head in disbelief. Don't their parents ever read the newspapers or watch the news with stories of missing children? We like to believe that it will never happen to us. So we let our children wander in the streets thinking that they will come home just in time for dinner. And what happens if they never return home that day?

Let the story of Nurin Jazlin be serve as a reminder to all parents out there (me included) and learn something valuable from it. And let us all hope for the best that Nurin will return safely to her loved ones very soon. There's nothing more joyous than seeing a family reunited with their lost ones especially little ones.

We could all use a happy ending story here.

Cerita puasa di bulan Ramadhan

Its that time of the year again when muslims all over the world celebrates the holy month of Ramadhan. I would like to take this opportunity to wish my blogger muslim friends a Selamat Berpuasa and Berbuka Puasa. May you all gain lots of pahala during this holy month.

Last year my eldest daughter had almost completed her puasa. She had only kantol'd twice, first on the second day of fasting when she complained of tiredness and second when she accidentally terbuka puasa before azan time. Not bad for an 8 year old who had decided to puasa full month that year.

I remember when I was about her age, I had kantol'd my puasa many times. When extreme thirst and fatigue crept in, I would sneak into the toilet (at home or school) in the pretext of gargling my mouth or washing my face when in fact I was stealing a few gulps.

I felt so freshened after a few gulps but afterwards, I felt so bad and ashamed of myself that I dare not look into my mother's eyes when she asked me if I was fasting. I was afraid that she would be angry and dissappointed so I just murmured a quick yes and dashed somewhere quickly hoping that she will not ask more questions.

I did the same thing to my daughter what my mother did to me. I interrogated her.

Whenever she came home from school everyday without fail I would ask her if she was fasting that day and she would curtly replied with a weak yes and ignored my concerned look. I wasn't satisfied with her answer and so I asked her again this time in a more polite and understanding manner.

"Kak Long, it's okay to tell the truth. I am not going to scold you if you break your fasting."

"I am fasting today lah ibuuuu..." she gave me that long weary look.

"oh ok, baguslah anak ibu nih...first time puasa penuh and you managed to tahan until azan." I was really proud of her dogged determination.

"That's good tapi kalau rasa tak tahan it's ok to break your fast...just tell me and I won't be mad...orait?"

Wait a minute there! Did I just encourage or discourage her with the puasa thing?

I guess I was just reminiscing my childhood days when I was about her age fasting for the first time. In that instant how I wish I could turn back the clock and tell my mum the truth without feeling scared.

I know she would understand.

Positive thinking

My first thought when I wake up in the morning: still alive and kicking.

My last thought when I'm getting ready for bed: tomorrow is going to be a different day from today.

What's your first and last thought of the day?

Another tag won't hurt

Perhaps I need a soft boost to jumpstart my blogging mojo after post merdeka holidays. Been kinda lazy lately to update my blog and what better way to start it by being tagged! I've been tagged by MrsD - thanks D for that wake up call. Just the thing I need.

5 things in my bag.

Well actually I've done this piece sometime ago. You guys can refer here but since it requires only 5 items so I'm gonna list down 5 important things only.

handphone

house keys

a wallet

a pen

baby cloth wipes

5 things in my wallet

some cash/coins

discount cards

old/new receipts

stamps

myKAD/driving licence

5 favorite things in my bedroom

my queen size bed

my lingeries

my fragrant bantal busyuk

my 14 inch tv

of course the guy who sleeps next to me

5 things I like to do

watch great movies

reading

housekeeping

lazing around after a hard day's work

shopping

5 things I am doing now (the way I interpret it)

doing this tag

doing this tag

doing this tag

doing this tag

doing this tag

5 people I want to tag

atrco

cik_ketumbar

cityglam

iza

bunga

Except atrco, the rest are all girls. Let see if they're man enough to do this tag.

p/s: sorry to dissappoint you D, there's nothing kinky in there... *wink*

Going 50

Negaraku

Tanah tumpahnya darahku

Rakyat hidup

Bersatu dan maju

Rahmat bahagia

Tuhan kurniakan

Raja kita

Selamat bertakhta

Rahmat bahagia

Tuhan kurniakan

Raja kita

Selamat bertakhta

50 things I want to do before I die

(in no particular order)

1. perform the ultimate pilgrimage for muslims - the haj
2. visit the 7 continents and wonders of the world
3. learn skateboarding or surfboarding (either one)
4. be the 1st tourist astronaut to visit Mars
5. meet oprah winfrey
6. learn 1 or 2 foreign languages
7. learn scuba-diving
8. learn to write feature-writing and become a good columnist
9. treat myself to an expensive spa treatment
10. attend andrea bocelli's performance of a lifetime
11. learn to bake cakes
12. do a duet with Josh Groban
13. sponsor education for underprivileged kids worldwide
14. do braces for my teeth
15. do lasik surgery for my eyes
16. do a major makeover
17. do a liposuction
18. buy a bigger house
19. get my writing published in a form of a book!
20. start my own business that I enjoy doing
21. donate money to charity
22. sponsor medical bills for people who can't afford them
23. take a self defense course
24. take pottery classes
25. learn to play 1 or 2 musical instrument
26. get a supporting role in a Steven Spielberg movie
27. do exercise seriously and not just talking about it!
28. grow a small but charming garden
29. read as many books that I can
30. buy an expensive dress
31. learn how to sew well
32. attend a live classical musical concert in Vienna
33. invest in a stock market and become a millionaire
34. be an inventor
35. learn how to draw and paint
36. learn how to skate on ice
37. buy my dream car
38. learn to swim and be a good swimmer
39. do skydiving feat from 30,000 feet above sea level
40. do bungeejumping
41. live in a farm somewhere in Tuscany, Itali
42. learn to fly a small plane
43. learn to ride a horse
44. go on a cruise ship
45. take up photography
46. learn bellydancing
47. be a little more kinder and compassionate
48. devote myself to a cause that I'm passionate about and volunteer for it
49. learn to appreciate my imperfections
50. do backpacking all over the world

Breastology

Ever wonder why women are so obsessed with their boobs? Its because they (the manufacturer) had labelled them according to sizes hence the A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G alphabets. Wow! I never thought that there are actually women with breasts bigger than size DD. Eeek! Anything huge than that must be manufactured.*LOL*

Think of Pamela Anderson (left pic) or the late Anna Nicole Smith.

Despite their perfectly well rounded grafity defying shape, it must be burdensome to carry them around, don't you think so? Just imagine the size and weight of 2 bowling balls (oh ok maybe not that heavy) dangling on your chest for the rest of your life. They kinda look deformed don't they? And not to mention the unwanted attention you might get if you happen to walk around with those precious assets.

Of course, men love to see those cuppies either big or small covered or not. They would drool over the sight of big chested women. So which category are yours? Mine? Err, ok lah, not so big not so small. Omputeh kata apa? Just nice to hold. *LOL*

Meet the serikandis

say cheese...... (pic courtesy of Mamakimi)

Its really really hard to start this blog when you had gone several weeks without posting. No wonder they tell you to write every frigging day. My excuse to stop writing then was; I have lost that blogging feeling. Hmm, sounds like a chart-topping song title to me. Just so you know, I'm still on hiatus mode but for this particular reason, I've decided to give it another shot.

Anyways, I just felt the need to write down details on the recent Srikandi gathering held last sunday afternoon with some of the girls from SU community website. If there's anyone or anything that I had left out in this entry do forgive me for I am afflicted with short term memory loss. I'll try to write it as shortest as possible. All I could say is the gathering was a major blast!

I had planned to bring along my 3 kids but my toddler son was sound asleep when it was time to leave the house. Turned out to be a blessing in disguise. That kid is totally out of control and I knew I would not be able to have good time if I tag him along. It was still drizzling on our way to the place. Initially it wasn't easy to find it, blame it on my hopeless sense of navigation. Since the printer was faulty hence I couldn't print the map, we had to rely on the address given only to find ourselves lost in the rows of houses somewhere in SBCR. Can you imagine that we were lost in our own backyard? Totally lame. Luckily, the security guard was kind enough to point the place where we were going and soon enough we found this corner-lot house buzzing with activities from outside its main entrance with kids roaming in the compound.

After I parked my car, we went inside and there were this 4 ladies sitting around a small table for registration. Someone asked my name and as I pointed out my nickname, there were screams all around. I finally met the statuesque glamour girl Cityglam (sheesh, I feel like a midget standing next to her), the effervescent Azlina, the camera trigger-happy Ila and Emylia, the petite gracious host in person. I also get to meet with the other ladies; the ever smiling Kenot and her twin girls she had always mentioned about, the pretty in pink Kakak, the happy go lucky Siketumbar, the demure looking ladies; Cikcah, Dianna, Orked and Srikantan, the female version of Jamie Oliver wannabes; Mamakimi, Yatt and Bunga, the feisty Noni, the glowing preggy mom Amaria, the sweet looking My and the unassuming Mama. Some of the ladies I had met during my weekends of aerobic; Laily, Cili Kering and Ara. Without further delay the ceremony started with Ara, the emcee giving a short speech and requested us to introduce ourselves. After the introduction session, we were being ushered to the sumptuous spread on the table. Apalagi makanlah! What can I say about the food? They were superb especially the luscious looking cupcakes and club sandwiches made by Mamakimi. The delicious bubur jagung was prepared by Bunga, fried beehoon and some malay kuih muih was prepared by Cengal Cafe. Yummy-licious indeed. I digged in for the cupcakes first.

After filling up our tummies with food it was time for the exchanging gifts session amongst us. I had a lovely bracelet from Bunga. In between the gift exchange, there was a lucky draw contest and the hampers were donated by 10210 owners. The gathering committees had also provided some entertainment for the kids with the likes of musical chairs and the goodies were great. I bet those kids must have loved those candies. I know mine did.

All good things must come to an end. It was a pretty small gathering with probably less than 40 people inclusive the kids but we had lots of fun together. Too bad I didn't bring my camera along. Granted, there were some ladies I didn't had the chance to mingle around but I was glad to get to know them. Perhaps we'll bump into each other someday somewhere. Till then.

Out of business

After much consideration this blog will not be deleted. However this writer will be on a LONG hibernation period.

She'll be back when she is ready to face the world again.

Tutup kedai

Dearest fellow bloggers & friends,

When I started this blog last november, my intention then was to pen my random thoughts indiscreetly. It was meant for my reading pleasure only. The thought of sharing it with other people didn't seem to occur in my mind at the time. When I finally decided to share it, I had informed a few friends only. Even then, those friends are confined within the neighbourhood circle I currently reside. But as time goes by, this blog has garnered readers outside that circle and from abroad as well. Seriously, who could have thought that someone like David_Santos would come all the way from Portugal to drop a line or two in this blog. I've read so many blogs (too many to mention here), some are delightfully funny and witty, some are super cool and some are seriously thought provoking. They were in a class of their own.

To borrow a few lines from Syana; that it is very tempting to be someone else in the cyber world, a nickname, a made up persona and an imaginary life. You might get the satisfaction you seek but how long will it last? She was so right about it.

In this invisible world, you are tempted to become someone else. An alter ego. Someone who is the opposite of you in nature. You tend to exaggerate that character a little bit just to make the story more punchy, dramatic and action-packed. A writer with too far fetched an imagination. A writer who got so carried away that he/she tends to forget the world he/she's living in.

I've decided to pull the plug for good. Its a decision that I have been mulling for days right after I went blank a couple of weeks ago. As much as I want to write as freely, openly and crazily as I want to, I have lost that desire. I had mentioned in one of my entries before that this blog is here to stay no matter come what may. I guess I have to swallow those words back. Blogging has also taken a lot of my time too. Someone very dear to me had pointed that out and it struck a blow at me. This surreal world has been the best playground ever for me. For a moment there, I felt like I was Alice in Wonderland. But it's time to return to the real world.

And for the first time today, I feel no pressure of thinking what to write next. Writing is supposed to be a fun thing to do not a chore.

It's been a heck of a joyride knowing you all. I had made many friends from the blogsphere although I haven't met all of them in person. Thank you for being my friend. I may still come knocking on your door and leave footsteps once in a while.

I wish you all the best.

Yours sincerely,

KC

p/s: I will keep this blog for another week before deleting it. Thank you again for coming here.

Yesterday once more

Hookay, before I bore everyone to death with more of my first stories, I promise that this will be the last of it. I have lots of first stories but I'll choose three of them as my best remembrance. I'll make this as quick as possible.

First time I shitted in my underwear:-

I was 6 years old kindergartener. We were doing sing-alongs with the teacher playing the piano when suddenly I had a stomach ache. The stomach spasms unexpectedly and before I knew it, I was helplessly writhing like a worm in pain and clenching my fists so hard that I could see my palms turning red.

Slowly, I walked back to my seat and sat there for as long as I can remember to. Drenched in the heavy sweats that covered my forehead, I soon found myself recoiling inward like a wounded animal, emitting groans and moans as I tried my best to stifle. The pain won't go away as I had hoped. To keep the storm raging inside at bay and fight the powerful urge to purge the putrid liquid bomb threatening to erupt forcefully from my rear, I held onto my seat holding it firmly as not to let it go. I was too scared to inform my teacher coz she was too engrossed playing the piano with her students all standing nearby singing some children songs merrily.

But as the pain became so unbearable I couldn't hold it any longer that I just had to release the offender. Right there and then. I could feel warm sensation underneath my rear and within seconds, deadly poisonous gas began to whiff its rotten aroma in the classroom. I could see all my classmates were pinching their nose and my teacher had abruptly stopped playing the piano and looked around. "What was that horrible smell?", she hollered. I had the look of fear in my face. The kind of face when you scratch it with something sharp, the blood won't ooze out. By this time, everyone in the classroom were looking at me and I was well, too malu to say anything. They had already figured out who the culprit was.

Suffice to say, I had completely soiled my underwear, skirt and blouse. An amah had to come and lifted me from my seat to the nearest toilet and gave me a good wash-up.

First time I had sung infront of an audience:-

I was in a boarding school. I had been transferred there from my former school after my parents finalised their divorce. It was an alien surrounding to me for I had known nobody there except my uncle (dad's bro) who happened to teach at the same school.

First month there was totally hellish. I had been subjected to bullying (not the physical kind) by seniors. They asked me to do all sorts of chore for them. It was more of a challenge actually. To complete some of the tasks that were given to me, I was asked to get full signatures from all the seniors. It wasn't easy to get their signatures. Some were nice and dutifully obliged my request. Some were playing hard to get. To these people, I had to earn it. They will ask me to carry out tasks like getting foods and drinks from the canteen, be a postman, wash their shoes and etc. In short, I was their servant.

There was this one senior who was totally pain in the ass. She was really getting into my nerve. She had made me do all the things she wants and yet I still hadn't gotten her signature. By this time, I was very pissed off and tired at her bossy nature. She requested me to sing a song as a last request. She thought I'd just give up and break down. Oh boy was she so wrong. Bring it on sistah! I grabbed a hairbrush and get on the bed and started to sing Cyndi_Lauper's_Girls_Just_Wanna_Have_Fun. Suffice to say, I managed to rock the house down. They were all jaw-dropped by my superb performance...woo hoo hoo! Sweetah!

First time I knocked down someone:-

I was driving hastily towards the roundabout junction at Jalan Pahang. It was a busy morning. People were rushing to get to work. There were two traffic policemen on duty. I was looking on my right and rear view mirror so I hadn't noticed this policeman who was standing giving instructions on my left. When I was about to move, one motorist suddenly jumped queve. I was startled. The driver behind me was getting impatient and started to honk at me.

I was quite panicked so I stepped on the accelerator a little too hard and bonk! I had accidentally knocked down the policeman. I didn't even know how he got to be infront of me. He escaped unhurt and he was so lucky I didn't rolled him over. He ordered me to pull over which I did nervously and gave me that stern look. He took down my particulars and in my jittery I thought I was going to jail! I apologized profusely to which he accepted and let me go. Phew!

Sweet November

Reading JT's recollection of her first memoirs brought back bittersweet memories of mine too. My first love story. It happened a very long time ago in my early twenties. I had already started work on my first job in KL then.


I met him at the bus stop while waiting for the next bus to board. I was alone. He was alone too probably waiting for the same thing. It was kinda late in the evening and I was rushing to get home soon. Didn't want my mom to start bickering non stop. In those days, mobile phones were unheard of. Public phone? Forget it. Most of the time, they had been vandalised especially the ones installed in the vicinity.

I don't normally bother to watch or stare at people go by. I'd just mind my own business. That was my life typically while waiting for the bus to arrive. So I hadn't really noticed him before. To me, he was just like everyone else at the bus stop - waiting for the bus to go somewhere.

So it was by pure chance that I got to meet him that fateful evening. The bus was late again as usual. So I took out a book from my bag and keep reading and was completely absorbed in it until I heard a soft voice. It was him. I remembered him saying something like this;

"Err...tumpang tanya. Ada orang duduk kat sebelah ke?" he was smiling.

"Tak de" and I smiled at him back.

"Boleh saya duduk sini?"

"Err..duduklah." And I continued reading my book.

"Maaf tanya dah lama ke tunggu bas kat sini? he asked apologetically somewhat understood that he had interrupted my blissful reading.

"Err...lama dah. Rasa macam nak dekat sejam dah. " I answered politely.

"Selalu tunggu bas kat sini ke? he asked again smiling. I remembered he had a sweet smile.

I just nodded.

By this time, I had absolutely no idea what I was reading about coz this guy sitting next to me seemed to be more interesting than the book itself. So I put down the book and started to chat with him. Being a talkative and friendly person that I am, it was really no big deal. Just a friendly chat. More on the topics of where does one work, what kind of work one does, where does one stay and things like that.

Until the bus arrived. After some pushing and shoving other people to get on board, we managed to get seats - next to each other. We continued the conversation like there was no tomorrow. I came to know that he had noticed me several times before but he was too afraid to make the first move. He said I looked serious and intense. I laughed heartily. I said how could I not be when I was reading a good book. He was a great storyteller. There was nary a dull moment with him.

The bus arrived at his place first. All this while he had been staying in his parents' house just 500 metres away from mine! He was from this taman perumahan and I was from the other taman perumahan in HK. How convenient!

Well, long story short, we had become closer to each other day by day. And we commuted to and from work together in that same bus no 270. We were like a couple. What I admired him the most is, not once had he tried to take advantage of me. The only thing he does to me was to hold my hand when we crossed the road.

The funny thing was, we never really utter the word love to each other. I guess there was no need to. Sure, we had said things like, I like you a lot and things like that but that was about it. Maybe both of us were too shy to declare our love for each other. Which was fine by me.

Then one day, out of the blue, he told me that he wanted me to meet his parents. When a man tells you something like that, you know that he is serious about you. The day finally came when I met them in person. He introduced me to his parents and siblings. I could feel my hands seram sejuk when I salam-ed with each one of them. His father was a rather quiet person but nice. He didn't talk much. So were his siblings. Most of them were polite. It was his mother that I was really bothered. She had that look in her face. You know the kind of look when someone doesn't like you. I felt it in her hands when she salam-ed with me. She didn't even looked at me when she talked to me.

I knew something was not right the minute she opened her mouth. She went straight to the point. And I didn't stand a chance.

"Dah lama ke kenal S ni? she looked at me sternly.

"Adalah nak dekat 6 bulan, makcik" I smiled nervously.

"Oh ye ke. Kawan2 gitu aje ke?"

"Err..ya makcik." I just didn't know what to say.

"Ohh...ingatkan kut ada apa apa ke. Makcik ni bukannya apa. Si S ni tak lama lagi nak kawin. Dengan sepupunya jugak". She blurted it out openly.

Doosh! It felt like someone had punched me in the face. It hurt so bad. I was completely stunned. He was too. I was totally speechless. I looked at him and he looked at me back. Quick. Think faster. I tried to remain cool but it was so hard to pretend when your voice kinda trembled.

"Oh..ye ke makcik. Baguslah macam tu. Bila tarikhnya?" I gulped.

"kalau takde apa apa halangan, hujung bulan 12 ni". The tone of her voice sounded like she had victory.

How I wish the earth would open up and swallow me at that instant. How I wish I could make myself dissappear right then. How I wish I hadn't come there in the first place. Mana nak letak muka. I felt so embarassed and stupid. But in reality, I was in his house infront of his family members. I had to act calmly. After I regained composure, I told him it was time to go home. I just wanted to get out from the situation as fast as I could. So I thanked to all his family members for being gracious hosts. I even kissed his mother's hand out of respect.

After we went out of the house, he offered to send me home in his dad's car. At first I didn't want to. I could always take the bus, macam tak biasa but he insisted that I should go with him. There was silence in the car. I didn't feel like talking. Suddenly, he stopped the car near the roadside somewhere. He turned to look at me and said he was so sorry for what happened. He didn't expect his mother to say those words. Later he confessed that his mother had mentioned to him sometime ago about matchmaking him with his cousin. She was still studying at the time. He wasn't interested because he had fallen in love with me. And that was the first time I heard him uttered those words. And that was the reason he wanted me to meet his parents. To tell them about me. But I guess his plan had backfired.

After the incident, I did a lot of soul-searching. I thought to myself, this wasn't going to work. No matter how much we seemed to love each other, his mother didn't approved of us being together. People always say - nak kahwin biarlah dapat restu dari ibubapa. Baru ada keberkatannya. I guess there's some truth in it. How could we possibly live together happily if I didn't get his mother's blessing. Syurga itu dibawah telapak kaki ibu. I didn't want him to turn against his mother for me. To take sides. Tearing apart mother and son relationship would be the last thing I want to do. So I chose to back off. Maybe I was a coward. I wasn't ready to face it. This was one battle I wasn't willing to participate.

So with a heavy heart, I managed to summon enough courage to end the relationship. As expected, he was totally against it. He pleaded with me to give his mom some time. Tears welled up in his eyes. But I was adamant. There was no turning back. So I said goodbye. And that was the end of it. We remained as friends only.

Years later, I received a wedding invitation from him personally. He showed up one day in my office and handed me the card. And the bride wasn't his cousin. So I guess he had found someone else. I decided then not to go to his wedding. Reasons I only know myself why. Wherever you are S, I wish you the best of luck. This song held a special place in my heart. It was the song I listened for days on end after the break up.

Mom's the word

Still reeling from that I-don't-feel-like-blogging feeling, I thought I'd just paste this quotes I got in email sent by a friend recently.

Motherhood is a very special and important job. Only those who had experienced motherhood would understand the agonies one goes thru during pregnancy and delivery of their children. After the birth of her infant, a mother's life will never be the same again FOREVER! Mark my word man.

Well, I'm just too lazy to add after second paragraph. Words get stucked in my mouth and my brain is currently going into a frenzy brain freeze. I can't help it. Its un-controllable. Its been this way for days.

Until I get back my blogging mojo, here are some of beautiful quotes I'd like to dedicate to all mothers out there wherever you are. Happy mother's day and have a lovely day this weekend with your loved ones.